I want to clear something up before I actually leave DA...I know at times I seem depressed. Sometimes, I can't lie yeah I do get depressed, but not nearly as much as it may seem. It has recently come to my attention that I have DPD (Depersonalization Disorder). It's a disorder that affects me in a way that detaches me from reality in a sense. Not that I see or hear things or have absurb notions or paranoia...it simply causes me to feel like nothing is real. You know when you wake up sometimes after a long night of drinking or over working yourself so the next morning you feel almost like your still asleep...yeah I'm like that all...the time. Like i'm watching myself from the corner of the room...like something isn't..right and I just can't place my finger on it. My head feels like it's full of water and when I move around, my head gets all wishy washy...what ever that fuck that means. I just don't want to leave DA with anyone confusing anything about me as far as that stuff...after all what kinda of zodiac cancer would I be if I didn't pretend I didn't give a fuck about what people think when deep down inside...it's one of the things that scare me the most? So...thank your for watching, commenting, putting up with my antics, laughing with me, laughing AT me and of course...aknowledging that I ever existed. It's one thing for me to feel like none of this is real but it's another to know that at least someone out there knows I do exist...the idea brings me back down to earth a lil more than usual. Who knows maybe after I found myself and my true passions again I'll come back but...iunno, we'll see...

While I'm gone please do me a huge favor... stop by page from time to to and and try and finally do what I couldn't...blow her the hell up

ciao

"So...what are you going to do now?"
"I don't know. All depends where this dream that I call my life takes me. All I really can do is hope for the best."




To get a some what general idea of what a person thinks/deals with/etc etc with DPD watch the movie "Numb"
IMDp link [link]
Trailer link [link]
Again it's just a general idea and no where close to what I'm actually like irl but...it's just a good movie period (FYI it is a love story so macho men be warned)